Growing up, I thought love was about getting things right. Saying the perfect words, showing up in the right way, knowing how to navigate emotions without making mistakes. But love—whether for ourselves, our partners, or our clients—isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence.
And presence often looks like play.
Play is underrated in love. We think of it as something for kids—silly, carefree, irrelevant to the serious work of relationships. But when we look closer, play is often where love flourishes. It’s the inside jokes, the random deep conversations, the way we open up when we feel safe enough to be silly or vulnerable. Play helps us break through emotional walls, soften fears, and connect in ways that words alone sometimes can’t.
When we allow play into our relationships, we invite a kind of lightness that makes connection sustainable. Love can be heavy at times—relationships require work, patience, and effort. But without moments of play, of spontaneity, of ease, relationships can become burdens rather than sources of joy.
That’s part of why I created my therapy cards—to give people a way to engage with emotions naturally. To make space for honest conversations, self-discovery, and connection without pressure. Love and emotional depth don’t always come from heavy, structured discussions. Sometimes, they emerge when we let our guard down and simply play.
Think about the relationships in your life—the ones that feel the most genuine, the most effortless. How often does laughter show up? How often do you let yourself be fully present, without trying to “get it right”? When we focus too much on perfecting love, we lose the spontaneity that makes it so powerful.
Presence means embracing the messy, imperfect, and unplanned. It means allowing ourselves to show up fully, whether that’s through laughter, curiosity, or shared silence. When we let go of rigid expectations of how love should look, we make space for the ways it actually unfolds.
This applies not only to romantic love but also to friendships, family bonds, and even the way we relate to ourselves. Self-love, too, isn’t about getting everything right. It’s about being gentle with ourselves, allowing for mistakes, and finding joy in our own presence. It’s about moments of play—whether that means trying a new hobby, dancing alone in your room, or simply letting yourself daydream without judgment.
So this Valentine’s, let’s rethink love. Let’s remember that love isn’t just spoken—it’s played, explored, and felt.
💜 Ask questions that go beyond the surface. 💜 Hold space for emotions, even the complicated ones. 💜 And most importantly—remember that connection isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about being willing to explore together.
Whether it’s through a game, a shared creative moment, or a spontaneous adventure, love isn’t about doing it “right.” It’s about showing up—playfully, imperfectly, and with an open heart. It’s about embracing both the light and the depth, the laughter and the vulnerability.
So go ahead—tell a silly joke, play a game, ask an unexpected question. You might be surprised at the kind of love that unfolds when you stop trying to perfect it and simply allow it to exist, as it is, in all its beautiful, messy, playful glory.
